Hulk Smash

Yeah I am a little late on the review, so what. In any case I have some thoughts about the movie, but first a little background. I am a comic book nerd, while other boys put their money into mouse, gel, izods, nu metal, and bad rap I was buying comics. While boys worked part time jobs to get that rusted out fire bird or that lifted truck I was washing dishes, up to my arm pits in old chowder, so I could turn around and dump that money on comic books. While other boys tried figure out how to convince the girls to pay attention to them I was searching for the last issue of the Longshot limited series because he wore leather and threw knives, which is friggin' cool (besides we all just ended up beating off, at least I got something out of it). I sat and gazed longingly at the Todd McFarlain drawn issue where Wolverine fights the Hulk, again. I remember the first issue where the gray Hulk clapped his hands to create a shock wave. Yes there was a gray Hulk, in fact that came before he turned green. That I know these little things should tell you something - I went into the Hulk with expectations. Fortunately those expectations were met.

The Hulk had enough subtle comic references and twists of the old TV show to make me wonder if I was actually dreaming. When they name dropped the creator of the super soldier serum on us I was all whoa! When Tim Roth got his first dose and was running around like Captain America (the first successful recipient of the super soldier serum) I was drooling. When Mr Blue turned out to be Dr Stern (he later becomes the villian the Leader) I nearly ruined my shorts, even if Stern was a janitor in the comics and not a scientist. The only nod I did not like was Dr Sampson - Betties boyfriend, who in the comics becomes Doc Sampson via Gamma radiation and gets his power from his hair. Sorta like a super powered Fraser. If that's not gay enough he later becomes Banner's therapist. Sampson I could live without. By the time Stark showed up at the end I needed a smoke. This is exactly the kind of super hero movie marvel should have been making from the start. Need government involvement - call Shield. Going to New York? You just may see Spiderman and Daredevil. The fact that everything is happening in the same place is a small, but key component.

All of these little things will serve a purpose, they will set up the Avengers movie - which includes both Iron Man and the Hulk, among others. Look at Spider-man, now imagine him running into the Hulk, pretty awesome huh? No?! Well screw you, why don't you ask those hoyty toyty dipshits what movie you should like, or that robot Kurt Loder (I am convinced he is a robot made by MTV). Go see No Country for Old Men, and pay $10 to see some unfinished shit. Sorry skipping the ending of the movie is not cool or hip, its lazy and dumb. Its saying I am so cool I am not even going to let you see how this ends. Please, I cannot turn in half finished websites and call it innovative anymore than a surgeon can do half a surgery. Film makers, bunch of pussies. Anyway, where was I, oh right the Avengers. All this set up of the Avengers is just an extension of what JJ Abrahams started with Lost. He showed we could all be led around by our noses to websites and sneak peaks. He showed that if you make something people actually like they will stick with it. In the end his gone-on-too-long-pretty-people-only-series opened the door for the awesomeness we have today with Iron Man and the Hulk.

Thanks JJ, your show sucks, but you proved to the studios that its better to make superhero movies for those that read the comics, not the tools that beat us up as kids.